Alumni Gazzette
The Toughest Job You’ll Ever Love
by Rosa Jimenez
She’s a teacher, cook, literature enthusiast, rescuer of lost toys, and all the other roles played by stay-at-home moms. Kelli (Wilson) Rigsby, a 1985 journalism graduate, may not spend her days riding around in limousines as she once imagined, but that doesn’t mean her days are without excitement and challenge.
Was it in your life plan that you would
be a stay-at-home mom?
Not at first. When I was growing up, my father was a church-school teacher,
which meant my mother had to work to help support the family. She preferred
to be a stay-at-home mom, but I didn’t understand the value in that.
I had absorbed secular society’s attitude—during the 1970s and 80s—that
if you aspired to be a stay-at-home mom, you weren’t exploring your full
potential.
What was your dream during your college
years?
I had grand aspirations to join the diplomatic corps after graduation so I
could live and work abroad. Somewhere along the way, I realized that the plan
was based on a subconscious desire to attend banquets in beautiful dresses
and to ride around in limousines. (Laughter.) I thought of myself as a liberated
woman, but I sure had a “princess” complex.
Tell us about your family.
Where do I start? Royce, age 9, and Rachel, age 7, are perfect. They never
fight or chew with their mouths open. They always smell good, and their rooms
are always clean. They never talk back, and they tell the funniest knock-knock
jokes you’ve ever heard. Um … okay, okay. I’ve been married
to Bob Rigsby for 14 years, and we have two children. I adore my kids. Royce
has reddish hair. Rachel’s is the color of taffy. They both have green
eyes, and when they smile at me, my heart melts. Bob works full time for the
King County Metro system as a millwright, which means he does a bit of everything
and anything mechanical that a bus base needs to keep it functioning. I have
been a stay-at-home mom for seven years—since shortly before our youngest
was born. We’ve been a homeschooling family for about three years.
What are the greatest rewards of your
work now?
I’m embarrassed to say this, but that’s a really hard question for
me. Being a stay-at-home mom has rewards, but often they are intangible. This
is not a glamorous job. And it’s not rewarding in ways that I’m
used to feeling rewarded. It doesn’t pay a wage. There’s no one
who evaluates my performance to provide suggestions, encouragement, or criticism.
And yet … there are those unforgettable moments … like when we rode
the bus to downtown Seattle just before Christmas. Royce bought a toy turtle
at the Pike Place Market, and when we were heading home, he left it on the
bus. We had walked two blocks before we even missed it. We knew we’d
never see that turtle again, but I drove immediately to the nearest Metro
bus base. By some miracle, that bus was parked right in front of the base.
Believe me, it was a miracle. I leaped from the van and ran to the bus. The
driver handed me the turtle, and I delivered it to my son. The look on his
tear-stained face was the greatest reward imaginable. By the way, we have
named the turtle Sherman-the-Miraculous.
How do you answer someone who asks “where
do you work” and you know they expect a standard career answer?
I smile brightly and say, “I work at home raising my children.”
What has been the biggest regret you have
in the path you’ve taken?
My biggest regret is that I didn’t prepare for the challenges of being
a mother and homemaker as much as I prepared for a career. I am a good mother.
I just wish I was a faster and more efficient cook and housekeeper.
What are the Kelli Rigsby top tips for
parenting success?
One, be honest with yourself and your children. Two, be consistent when you
discipline, and three, listen to yourself when you talk to your kids. Would
you want someone to talk to you that way? Finally, pray without ceasing!
Any advice for someone considering homeschooling
their kids?
There are so many choices now. Choosing a curriculum can be overwhelming.
Join a homeschool support group and get suggestions from the group and/or
from friends that homeschool. Find a curriculum you will enjoy, and then be
brave enough to change what doesn’t suit you or your kids’ needs.
For example, I love to read out loud—to anyone who will listen. So I
chose a curriculum that’s “literature rich,” which means it
includes lots of great books for me to read to my kids. They also have “readers”
which they use to hone their reading skills.
Any witty comebacks to questions like
“What do you do all day?”
My witty comeback is the classic one: “I sit around buffing my nails,
watching soap operas, and eating bon bons.”
Is being a stay-at-home mom easier or
harder than most people think?
It’s the toughest job you’ll ever love.
What did you study in college?
Journalism.
Do you find what you studied in college
to be helpful in your role now?
You bet. I’m good at teaching language arts. I’m great at spelling
and punctuation and investigative stuff like looking up words in the dictionary.
Right now, what would you choose: a Hawaiian
vacation or a week alone to clean out the closets?
There’s no contest! I’d give anything … anything … for
a week alone to clean out closets.